May 27, 2009

Good bye ice cream

That's it. Good bye, adios, arrivederci, ma'assalama, adieu, auf wiedersehen. No more ice cream- and this is just after realization that I had indeed found an ice cream that I love. I loe its taste, texture, color.. everything. And now I can no longer have. Dairy products are probably playing a major part in my diarrhea and it starts with ice cream. No more Baskin Robbins, Ben&Jerry..
During my days off I have been experimenting with various "foods" and trying to find out where am I going wrong. Yesterday was one of those days when I barely made it to the restroom, and since then.. hmm.. not all details need to be shared, but let's just say I was practically living in the restroom for the remaining hours of the day. Yuck.
I've always loved all kinds of dairy products, but this may be the end of the road- instead look for lactose-free products, if they'd be somehow suitable.

May 26, 2009

Bad drivers and diarrhea

They are everywhere; bad drivers, who are self-centered and full of themselves, and ignorant of all of traffic rules. It's probably not possible to find a perfect driver in this world, but some are very very good. I guess it depends on where in the world these people learned to drive.. but some of them shouldn't drive even a bike or a child's tricycle.
What happened to the good manners on the road?
Let pedestrians cross the road in peace, if you plan on turning left, indicate "LEFT" early enough, not when you are already turned left and out of sight. If you were still in sight, you'd see me mouthing bad words and showing an international finger symbol. Where on earth did you get you drivers licence...?! By driving "straight" line for 20 yards? By bribing an officer? Either way, learn to drive. If you plan on turning the volume of car radio up to the roof, go do it someplace else, I don't share your music interests. Shout "hello" from the car and speed away, you can be sure I won't even be looking at your direction, besides driving your dad's Maxima does not impress me. Or that Mercedes that you've borrowed from your uncle.
Two teenagers in a car in Riyadh in 2002; they were following me and my friend K everywhere on that particular "shopping road". We popped into a shop, they were waiting outside. We crossed the road, they were soon after us again. The same went on for half an hour, finally I got my cellphone out of the bag and pretended to call someone. Police, my husbad, spacemen, who cares but that did the trick and the two cowards were soon on their way. Haha. I doubt they were even teenagers, they could have been below 12 years of age, joyriding on their daddy's car. Mind you, it wasn't an expensive Mercedes.

Ther have been times when I have been driving little too fast, but I have never received a ticket. I don't intend to.
Whatever the reason. Even when I have diarrhea, which nowadays happens multitude of times daily, I still don't speed. Instead, I have few spare diapers in the car. At least I can save myself from completely surrendering to diarrhea. Details of diarrhea don't need to be told here, all I can say is that I am going for colonoscopy soon. This could be related to the removal of gallbladder- but apparently not related to the old thyroid carcinoma, so that's a relief, some degree of relief anyway. In hot and humid weather it becomes a number one priority to drink and replace lost fluids..

May 04, 2009

I shouldn't have..

When I remember the days more than a year ago, that was the time when I had cancer. Many things changed, priorities in life, values, everything. Then months and months afterwards I began to feel more settled and thought things would get back to normal, but there was nothing that resembled that "normal" state of being. Cancer will always be part of me. Now my cousin has been diagnosed with Hodgkin's lymphoma and this brought back the memories. How did I truly feel?
Desperate, sad, ready for a battle, merciful, adventurous, challenged, hopeful.. All that and more.
During those months, living with cancer, I wanted to experience many things and prove I could still do it. Someone, who was also diagnosed with cancer, said that as long as she can walk and run, she knows she is alive. I was walking, running, traveling, doing things I had never done, as fast as I can, in a hurry. My days.. I didn't know how many were left.

Since then I have not really felt scared. Not really. Well.. yearly check-ups; body scans, blood tests.. it never gets easy, each time it brings little more distance between myself and cancer. Cancer used to dominate my life, but it no longer does it.

Other scary things: I shouldn't have been watching the movie "Hostel Part II". All that blood, violence was too much. Have any of you seen it? I nearly threw up and will probably have nightmares tonight. For once I wish I was at work at night and wouldn't need to sleep. This is not the first movie mistake, there are others too: Saw movies, Coma, Halloween, Omen, Exorcist.. And why did I watch all these..? I guess that's the adventurous part of me.. But the feeling does not last, it is like having a drink, another drink.. and one more. And then one of the worst hangovers- that's how I feel.