February 14, 2007

The curse of Feb 11

Feb 11 arrives every year- this year I realized what the date was not first thing in the morning, but late in the evening. The day had been nearly as disastrous as the one year before- who would have guessed.. Arguments at work, ineffective communication, feeling like I am locked in somewhere and cannot get out. Saying the wrong words, everything inside out, upside down. One of those days when the best option is not to get up in the morning.
Anyway the day after could have easily been worse..
I went to the staff clinic for PPD tuberculosis test two days before, and then for test results on this day. To their (=staff clinic) my result was positive! What can I say, just sit there, astonished, looking at my arm where a red patch measures 0.7cm. Unsure of the meaning of the result, I ask what this means, what is the next step. TB clinic! Chest x-ray! TB drugs! None of this what I wish to hear, but I make a mental note to research TB and find out whatever I can about this subject. For sure I have no TB, all my previous chest x-rays have always been clear and I have no TB symptoms either. It was like the nurse got some secret pleasure for seeing me looking so lost and confused. But on the day when they injected this alien substance (PPD) in my forearm, it later changed into red burning patch and I wondered what caused this (hot shower, new Multivitamins..?). They talked about antibodies, and my body is already full of them, and I am not going to take any other drugs that mess up my system.

Happy Valentine's Day.

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